Should be...but really shouldn't be!

I am so tempted to say and think lots of "should be's" right now.
"We should have a newborn in the car with us on the way to Mississippi for Christmas"
We should have 6 stockings instead of 5"
"I should be nursing Lucy right now."
But, a dear friend shared some very truthful words with me.  I shouldn't be! That was not The Lord's plan for Lucy. He has known from the beginning of time that our 4th child...a precious daughter that looked just like her big brother,Hunt, and her daddy...would bless us for 3 days. He knew she would forever change our hearts and lives!

I needed this loss to understand what true suffering and heart break is. I needed it so I would fix my eyes on our Lord and Savior. I needed it so I would fully understand what it means to cling to Him. I needed it so I would realize how truly selfish I am, and I can't live fully without my God and King.  Of course I wish it wouldn't have taken the death of my Lucy for me to realize these things! But our God knows best!

This Mama is forever changed! Moments with my children are so much sweeter...I cherish each one of them for who they are and the unique qualities that The Lord gave them.  I adore my husband for the strength he has shown and continues to show...but thankful he has also shown me his broken heart as well! I love him so much!
I begin 2014 with an open heart, open mind and open arms! I look forward to all the things he will reveal to us!

Here's to a 2014 full of peace, love, joy, comfort and healing!!